On the Edge

OKCupid will alert you when someone looks at your profile, sends you a message, and chooses you in their little match game.

Last night, I got a message from a guy who had been looking at my profile. Alright, I can't control that those two e-mails came in back to back, so I didn't think much of it. I signed in, read it, then signed out. A couple of minutes ago, he chose me on the match game. Apparently, I'm a hot commodity.

Here's his message:

Hey [my username], love the 2011 photos. IDK for some reason you look kinda "edgy" back then which makes me think your personality consist of a multitude of layers; am i wrong? Clearly, you have the sexy librarian persona on lock and i imagine the other sides of youare just as beautiful... I'm hoping you're open to talking to an african american guy who finds your pictures almost as attractive as your profile. Talk soon!

What makes this a little creepy to me is that when the e-mail came in about the match game, I noticed that he's listed as 39 / Male / Straight / Married.

Maybe they have an open relationship. Maybe they have an understanding...but it still feels weird when someone in a relationship calls me beautiful and attractive.

Also...edgy? Really? In jeans and a t-shirt? Really?

Three Messages

I haven't checked my OKCupid inbox since the beginning of February, but I just got an e-mail notification that I had a message, so I went in and found three new messages! If I had gotten three new messages in a little over a month when I was still single, I would have been shocked and amazed...so of course they come when I'm not single.

Message the First

first thing i see from this site is that gun you are holding lol

Fair enough; my main profile picture is me and a Stormtrooper from last year's Dragon*Con. What's a little weird about this guy is that under the "The most private thing I'm willing to admit here" section, he has "Aliens are gods."

So that's a little weird.

Message the Second

Do like hot, passionate sex talk? I bet we could have some real fun together.....

This is yet another instance when I wonder if this ever works. I would like to know the percentage of women who would get that message and think, "You know...I really do like hot, passionate sex talk. I should definitely e-mail this guy back."

Kudos for the use of the comma after "hot," though; normally those messages are rife with illiteracy. I almost want to message the guy and ask him to talk to me slowly...grammatically...

Message the Third

I would like to be your friend and know you, I think that knowing a person is like, open a new workbook, you always learn new things

I've heard the phrase "like an open book," but I'm not entirely sure I like being compared to a workbook. For some reason, that brings back visions of those awful enrichment math books my mom used to get for me in elementary school because I struggled with multiplication and division.

Pre-Marital Hanky Panky!

Him: when was your last realtionship
Me: guy i was sorta dating just decided yesterday that he wanted to be just friends, actually.
Me: but it hadn't been going on that long.
Him: awww
Him: so wasnt' a long term?
Me: no
Him: when was last relationship
Me: ended jan 2009
Him: wow, so no hanky panky for almost a year?

I can't decide which of the following is the worst part:

1. That he assumes "hanky panky" only happens within the confines of a serious relationship (or at least that it does for the womenfolk).
2. That he thinks a year is a long time to go without "hanky panky."
3. That he used the phrase "hanky panky" unironically.
4. That Jan 2009 to now is "almost a year."
5. That he lives in a world where that is an appropriate question to ask someone he's just met and is considering dating.