Wednesday, February 17, 2010


Without further ado, let me bring you Ralfy:

Wus up peoples my name is ralfy im half puertorican an dominican.Im born an raised in New York,i am a Building Inspector/Firefighter/Hairdresser and soon to be a Police Officer.As you can see I like to work,well i should say i like the money but who dont.I have a 6 year old daughter who is my life I LOVE YOU MAMA!!! I like to be in the outdoors doing basicly anything like hunting, fishing ,camping going four wheeling etc.........I dont know what else to say other then im looking forward to meeting some new people.

I like this profile. It's full of surprises. It lures you in with the possibility of normality, then SPINS right around into the strange. I've never met a building inspector/firefighter/hairdresser/police officer before.

However, I am also slightly concerned about the juxtaposition between telling us his daughter is his world and this sudden capslock ridden shout of loving his mom. I'm left with two choices: either he has familial ADD or he calls his daughter Mama. Both may be equally bizarre.

But I love the run on sentences; the possibilities for what any of those phrases could mean are almost endless depending on where I choose to put in the punctuation.

For instance, I think "Ralfy Im Half Puertorican An Dominican" is one helluva name. It would NEVER fit on any of those standardized test fill-in-the-bubbles-with-your-name sheets.

This is a man who could never take the SATs.


  1. y'know, i think it's a cultural thing. i used to date a puerto rican guy in high school and he'd call his little brother "papa." it was kinda weird.

    but srsly, this guy doesn't seem nearly as odd as some of the others you've featured.

  2. I concur. His was more a profile of fun & surprises than completely wacky.