Sunday, February 21, 2010

This is why we do not talk about boobs.

This guy had IMd me several times prior. The first time, he was a little creepy, but meant well. So I talked to him for a while. Then he got creepier, like calling me by my full name after Facebook-stalking me, and constantly asking me if I was talking to other guys, so I tried to get rid of him. But that was in July. He's gotten a bit more direct since then, it would seem.

weirdguy: hey
weirdguy: nice cleavage there - flaunt it
me: ugh.
weirdguy: just stating facts'
weirdguy: but yes - i guess i need to get laid soon to - right?
me: how would I know?
weirdguy: looking at the pic and noticing only the cleavage perhaps is a giveaway?
me: that just makes me think you're kind of an ass.
weirdguy: all men are - lookss like you never had one to know that

You all saw that I didn't start that, right? He brought it on himself, then decided to go for the low blow when I didn't like his approach. I totally didn't start that.

me: well that's a very nice thing to say.
weirdguy: only as nice as you are
me: if you say so.
weirdguy: just said it - didnt i?
me: "if you say so" does not imply doubt as to whether you actually said so.
me: you're not very good at this.
weirdguy: does evince a marked degree of compositional activity
weirdguy: that tends to have a rhythm
weirdguy: however, checkered by incompetence
weirdguy: correct - not very good at this

LOLWUT? Someone got a new "word of the day" calendar.

me: and what is it you're after?
weirdguy: friends with benefits
me: you won't get it here.
weirdguy: figured that out when i knew you didnt understand men
me: what I don't understand are generalizations. that's all.
me: and for the record, you either have a brain, or at the very least, a thesaurus. lead with that rather than comments about a woman's tits and maybe you'll get a better response.
weirdguy: no point in wasting my time there
me: well it's unfortunate you feel it's a waste of time.

What a chore, showing a potential partner you're more than a penis with limbs. I mean, what good could potentially come of that? Booooring.

weirdguy: what to do - not getting anywhere with this
me: you should have figured that out before you even sent me a message. we've talked before, you were still an ass then, and I was still uninterested.
weirdguy: women turn around when they have not had a man in their lives for a long time - guess not you

So I'm supposed to finally get so sick of being alone that I lower my standards just enough to be with the likes of you? And again with the generalizations.

weirdguy: good luck with your life
me: lol, okay. back at ya.
weirdguy: i am all set for now - thank you - bye bye
me: try not to IM me again, thanks.
weirdguy: sure - will "try" not to

Ten bucks says I hear from him again. Because they never remember they've talked to you before, no matter how horribly it went. And despite the fact that the site saves all your chat logs and shows them in the current IM window.

And here's a short but confusing exchange from last night.

40somethingdude: you need to be an older man.........
me: why would I want to be an older man?
40somethingdude: duh????
me: I'm afraid I don't understand what you're getting at.

Is this reference to my "gay man in a straight woman's body" comment? His profile said he was straight, so that would make no sense. Did he mean "be WITH an older man"? He should have caught that when I didn't get it. I just... I don't know. Perceptive, this one.


  1. At least he's up front that he's looking for friends with benefits, right? Right? Maybe?

    And you'd think that 40somethingdude would have followed up with "Because we're more somethingsomethingsomething" if he hadn't caught that he'd missed a word instead of "duh".

    I has confusion.

  2. I had to stop reading this. It was embarrassing me too much.